We’re not making this up.

The Carlsberg brewery in Copenhagen, Denmark, just changed its policy on beer in the workplace.

It used to allow workers to take as many beers as they wanted from coolers around the production and warehouse areas. The only restriction: You can’t be drunk at work. It was up to the workers to be responsible. So, you see, they were thinking about safety.

Now, the workers can only drink beer during their half-hour lunch breaks in the company canteen.

So scores of workers went on strike.

Their union says it doesn’t mind the new policy, which other companies are adopting throughout Denmark. What bothers the union and workers is that they weren’t consulted on the policy.

Carlsberg’s truck drivers joined the production and warehouse workers in the strike, even though they’re covered by different beer rules. The truck drivers can bring three beers from the canteen because they don’t often have time to have their lunch there.

Recently, we wrote about a survey that put “safety” as the No. 6 most annoying thing in the workplace. So, we asked you what is most annoying about workers when it comes to safety. Here are your answers:

One of the most common complaints was workers who say things like, “I’ve been doing that this way for 20 years and have never gotten hurt.” A slight variation on the theme: “I have 20 years experience. Don’t tell me how to do my job.”

When it comes to one specific worker action that is annoying, “wearing safety glasses/goggles on top of their heads” was mentioned the most.

Some other annoying worker practices when it comes to safety:

• Supervisors who walk right by obvious safety violations.
• “Safety is the safety manager’s job, not mine.”
• Employees who say they don’t have time for safety.
• Safety costs too much.
• Managers who require workers to attend safety meetings and then don’t show up themselves.
• Workers who prefer not to know about safety rules and then say they were out of the loop.
• Not reporting injuries. “It happened a month ago, but I thought it would quit hurting, so I didn’t tell anyone.”
• “I’m the engineer. I get the thing to run. You’re the safety person. You figure out how to do it safely.”
• Upper management that won’t get serious about safety.
• “Where does it say that I have to _____?”
• Blocking exits, aisles, fire extinguishers, eyewash stations, etc.

After reading all of those (and probably recognizing many, if not all of them), are you really annoyed?

We don’t want you to spend the rest of the day that way. So, we’ll note that a number of you seemed to have a good sense of humor while writing about these annoyances. And while safety is, of course, very serious business, it can help you get through the day to have a sense of humor about it.

Here are some worker annoyances from safety pros that show that they’re not about to let the few employees who ignore safety get them down:

• “We are safety-ed to death.” (The workers who said that obvious didn’t think about their statement.)
• “Safety, safety, safety. All we ever talk about is safety, and we don’t even have any accidents around here.” (Well, must be working, right? )
• “We never had all this safety s*** before,” from the guy missing part of his thumb because it was ripped off in a drill press.
• Right out of the childhood playbook: “They’re not doing it, so why should I?”
• “That wouldn’t be in the aisle for someone to trip over if we didn’t have to participate in this Safety Tour during our clean-up time.”
• When people open a meeting by saying, “Let’s get this party started.” If it were a party, there’d be more beer and hot people in the room.

And some of you really liked one comment and requested a copy of the so-called “Dumb-ass Certificate”:

Deviation Under Modified Basis—Agreement Support Sheet (DUMB-ASS Certificate)

I understand that there are identified rules and procedures in place but I cannot accomplish the task on the basis of those rules. I am applying for this Dumb-Ass certificate so I can get an exemption to perform (name task) without following the following safety procedures.

The reason that I want the Dumb-Ass exemption is (check all that apply)…

You get the picture.

When it comes right down to it, a one-word comment we received sums it all up. The most annoying worker habit when it comes to safety: Excuses.

How do you counter workers’ excuses? Let us know in the Comments Box below.

And that’s despite how awful some of the ads are.

Well, one New York law firm is winking at its audience, saying, “We know those other ads are really bad.”

Trolman, Glaser & Lichtman has a new TV ad that pokes fun at other injury lawyer ads.

A woman says she’s in excruciating pain. Every time she moves, it feels like a machete chopping down on her.

The punch line: “It was the worst paper cut I ever had. They made that paper way too sharp. Someone has to pay.” She holds up her finger with a small bandage on it.

Then, the tagline, via a voiceover: “If you’ve been injured, call us, but keep in mind: You really need to be injured.”

Law firm partner Jeffrey Lichtman tells The New York Times, “It’s saying to the public that we understand that we’re a litigious society, No. 1 and, No. 2, we understand that litigiousness is food for a joke. But we also recognize there’s an importance to having access to the court system if there has been an injustice.”

Air New Zealand is using a new tactic to make sure passengers keep their eyes on video screens for its in-flight safety instructions.

The carrier’s safety video for domestic service on its Boeing 737 planes show pilot and cabin crew dressed only in body paint.

To make sure the video wouldn’t get a X rating, the camera angles are carefully chosen and the crew holds up strategically-placed items such as life vests.

You can view the safety video online here.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has a series of e-cards that address health issues such as blood pressure, diabetes and pregnancy.

But some of the cards could really come in handy when any sort of illness — swine flu, a stomach virus or even the common cold — appears in your workplace.

One card shows a picture of a woman with her hand to her forehead. It says, “Stay home!” The message inside when you click on the card: “Stay home if you have symptoms, like fever, cough, runny or stuffy nose, sore throat, body aches, headache, chills, and fatigue.” There’s also a link for recipients to click and get more information about the flu.

Know of co-workers who don’t wash their hands after using the restroom? Send them the “Wash ‘em” e-card. It recommends recipients wash their hands with warm soapy water or use alcohol-based hand cleaners.

The CDC’s e-cards are online here.

It’s not likely, according to a Standard Interpretation Letter (SIL) released recently by OSHA.

A concerned baseball fan, Robert Van Laanen, wrote a letter to OSHA regarding the dangers of new wooden bats shattering.

The fan was concerned that increasing numbers of shattered bats might pose more hazards to players and spectators.

Van Laanen wanted to know if OSHA could press professional baseball to change back to sturdier wooden or metal bats.

The answer: Probably not.

In a response signed by the Director of Enforcement Programs, Richard Fairfax, OSHA said the answer depends on whether pro athletes meet the definition of “employee” under the Occupational Safety and Health Act or whether they’re independent contractors.

OSHA rules might apply only if they’re employees.

Fairfax’s letter goes on to note that the employee or contractor determination would need to be made on a case-by-case basis.

And even if they were considered employees, OSHA doesn’t have any specific, applicable standards that address protection for pro athletes.

What does this all boil down to? This statement: “In most cases, however, OSHA does not take enforcement action with regard to professional athletes.”

Leave it to OSHA to take a nine paragraph letter to say “No.”

The astronaut may never get her hands on those tools again.

Heidemarie Stefanshyn-Piper was working with fellow astronaut Stephen Bowen during a spacewalk outside the International Space Station.

They were attempting to clean and lubricate a stuck joint on a solar panel.

When a grease gun inside Stefanshyn-Piper’s tool bag exploded, she accidentally let go of it.

The bag and its contents floated off into space.

Earlier, the astronauts spotted a screw floating by, but were too far away to catch it. They don’t know where it came from, and Mission Control said it didn’t pose a serious hazard. (Apparently, having a screw loose is not uncommon at NASA.)

And just like earthbound employees who work at heights, the two astronauts were tied off. They had 85-foot tethers to keep them connected to the space shuttle Endeavor at all times.

You can watch raw video of the loss of the tool bag here. You can hear Stefanshyn-Piper say, “Oh great,” when the bag floats away.

Lavely runs Sarah’s Smash Shack where people can hurl dishware and knickknacks at a wall to relieve pent-up stress.

And the only possible thing this has to do with safety is that photos accompanying a wire service story about the successful Smash Shack show its patrons dutifully wearing safety gear: helmets with face shields, coveralls and gloves.

That’s the end of the safety stuff in this post. For those who are just intrigued by the idea of getting out their aggression by smashing things, keep reading.

Lavely charges $10 and up for 15-minute intervals. Rock music blares, and a neon sign urges people to “Break More Stuff.”

The “House Special” is one of the most popular choices. It mimics a rowdy Greek supper club where diners smash 15 plates for 15 minutes. Cost: $45.

But that’s not all! Patrons can write nasty epithets on the plates with thick black markers before the smashing starts.

Also popular: Highly breakable picture frames (3 for $10). Slip a photo of an enemy in and smash away!

“It was the best $50 we spent in the last two years,” said one customer.

Can franchises be far behind?